We are guilty as sin for living our lives caring what other people think of us as a whole. We just tiptoe and pussyfoot through life by doing things just to please others. Well, my readers, we cannot live by pleasing everyone. That’s just living in a prison and allowing the guard to swallow the key.
I wanted to post this on Independence Day weekend to give the cyber world something more to the plate next to the rack of ribs, potato salad, baked beans, and Aunt Betsy’s apple pie. Food for thought to give us the energy to knock down the wall we build ourselves around. Not to be political here just bare with me. We groaned at the idea of Donald Trump wanting to construct a wall around the border. Why do we do it around the realms our of minds?
One word. Perception. We drive ourselves crazy by our actions, appearances, and lives being allowed by how we think other people perceive us. It’s not healthy for us to think that way. Especially for me with my Generalized Anxiety Disorder. It will be discussed later on in this blog site. This madness has to stop and we must start by not giving a damn.
We are not that special. We have not come from the loins of royalty. For years, when I started this blog site, I have always said that I’m just a kook with a forum. I’m sure an unmarried, childless woman wants to contest that theory via email, but, hey, c’est la vie.
We live in a society where we live, breathe, and die with our smartphones. So if you do something awkward or embarrassing, we will forget about it some odd seconds later being too busy thinking about ourselves and our shortcomings or immerse ourselves in our smartphones checking out the Facebook feeds. During my time in college, I mastered the art of not giving a damn. As an example, for my psychology class, I gave a presentation wearing my purple wig and lab coat. The teacher was keen with the idea and gave me a B in the course. Also, for another course, I used a Star Wars light saber as a pointer for a presentation and walked out with an A. Another thing I have learned from those said experiences is that most people are looking around to see how other people are reacting. They want to be part of the flow and seen as they know what’s going on.
By now, we are familiar with the phrase, a sucker is born every minute. The sucker will become the people-pleaser who go to the extremes accommodating to others. If you are in fear of being judged, I strongly advise you to seek psychiatric help. Most people despise push-overs and will have no problem disrespecting them out in the public square. You can never please everyone and I learned that in the Air Force. I was the only one, if not one of the few, on the fitness center staff who had no qualms telling colonels and generals what they can and cannot do. They didn’t like it, but it has earned me respect. For the single guys, people pleasing will not get you a woman such as this one below.
To wrap up this wonderful, classic commentary with a shiny bow. I will leave you with three things.
Know Your Values:
It can never be stressed enough to know your core values. People cannot look up to you when you have no values and nothing to aim for in life. When you have a set of values and something to believe in, people will respect you. Also, remember that like and respect are two different things.
Put Yourself Out There:
I’ve been doing it for years. I have no problem sharing a bit of the wealth. After all, sharing is caring. Blogging, public speaking, asking someone out, or even dancing!
Surround Yourself With Confident People:
Here’s the other thing I’ve been doing for years. Surround yourself with people who are confident and live life without selling themselves short. Within time, they will influence your way of life and well-being. Back when I was in the Air Force, I spent weekends with guys who had no problem speaking their minds and never compromised their values. One of the reasons they allowed me to hang out with them is that I can be honest and direct, even when we disagreed with each other once in a while.
This is something that cannot be done overnight but do not get discouraged. It is a change that will grow with time. I grew up in a poor area where any form of intelligent life is frowned upon. I got into a lot of fights over it, but I kept on standing and refused to be part of the status quo.
Those who influence and mentor other people do not give a damn. They are revered, admired, and respected amongst other people. Do it anyway you wanna, be fearless, and stand up for what you believe in. After all, there is a world full of people who do not. Happy Independence Day!